Status Update

It's been almost a week and we're slowly adjusting. One of the things you can't really prepare for is the lack of sleep that a newborn brings. Cole is no exception. The first several nights were exhausting and Brandon and I both felt like we were getting sick from it, so we came up with a new plan. We would take shifts. I sleep the first half the night while he takes care of Cole and then we switch. We figure that a few hours of uninterrupted sleep is better than the same amount of time spread out through the night. This is our first night trying it, so we'll see how it goes. It's 4am and I feel good so far. Much better than any other time I've seen 4am on the clock this week.

Cole is doing well. He's very healthy and doing all the things a baby should do, which is eat, sleep and poop. And he definitely has each one of those down.

Amy's adjustment is a little slower than we had hoped, but probably should have expected. She is getting more used to him being here every day, and we are trying our best to show her the same attention she received before. She even held him for about 5 seconds yesterday. Progress!

He has a name

Meet Cole Alexander

Baby's here!

Up late, in a hospital bed, holding our new baby boy. I would love to be sleeping, but two nurses have already said they were coming back soon, so there's not much point in trying. 

He was born at 9:39 pm, weighing in at 9 pounds 2 ounces and was 21 3/4 inches long. Labor lasted about 7 1/2 hours, with only about 20 minutes of pushing. Once the epidural kicked in, it was actually quite easy, with no pain at all as he was coming out.

We were also lucky to have several family members in the room with us, so it made the day go by much quicker. Overall, a pretty successful day.

He still has yet to be named, but hopefully soon! So for now, the newest member of the family.

A blog about a blog

I wanted to post something today, but since we were up half the night with Amy, my brain is a little under the par this morning. While I was up though, I decided to check Facebook and saw something Huffington Post shared. I thought it was very fitting, so I figured I'd share also. 

You often hear the phrase "I need a vacation from my vacation."

I try not to use clichés, but after just a few days at the beach, I need a vacation from my vacation.

Unfortunately, I have a kid. So I'll never get one.

You lose a lot of things when you have kids. (Yes, bleeding hearts, you gain a lot too -- like a new perspective and a bigger heart and cuts on your feet from stepping on LEGO pieces -- but becoming a parent forces you to shed much of your old lifestyle to accommodate your new one.) Never is this more clear than when you go on holiday with your offspring.

What used to be equal parts bender and relaxation -- a stretch of time devoted to drinking and napping, eating and swimming, staying up late and waking up late -- becomes a test of endurance. A brutal battle to max out your stamina and maintain enough energy and enthusiasm to reap as much reward as possible, even as your energy and enthusiasm dwindles.

That's not to say it's not fun. Mom and Buried and I had a blast taking Detective Munch to the beach. He had a great time playing in the sand with his honorary uncles, and the adults even managed to have a few pops and eat a few meals without a few meltdowns (he was seriously well-behaved most of the time). Overall, it was great success. But this morning, even after a decent night's sleep in my own bed, I woke up feeling... what's the opposite of refreshed?

So, what is it about being a parent that's so exhausting? (Especially a parent of a go-go-go toddler who has no independent life without his Mommy and Daddy.)

It's not that having a toddler is physically exhausting, although it is. Running after him when he breaks loose in a store or a parking lot or on a beach; wrestling him down to brush his teeth so he doesn't end up looking British or to apply sunscreen so he doesn't end up looking British; carrying him to bed or to the bath or in and out of his car seat while he flails and kicks like a fish with limbs. All of that is definitely exhausting. But that's not the real issue.

And it's not that having a toddler is mentally exhausting, although it is. Devising lists in your head every time you leave the house just to make sure he has his lovey and his milk and his snacks and some crayons and some diapers and some wipes and a stroller and the sunscreen and his toy phone and his coloring books; stressing out every time you think there might be egg or peanuts or gluten or glass in his food; worrying all night long that he's being too quiet in bed or not quiet enough; gritting your teeth at a restaurant or at a store or on playdate when he starts to scream and throw a tantrum and people are watching you. All of that is definitely exhausting. But that's not the real issue either.

Of course, being exhausted is not just for parents. Once you hit a certain age, energy is just harder to come by; pretty much everyone I know is exhausted all the time. It's just life.

But as a parent, there is one primary reason I am always so tired: the lack of recovery time.

One of the earliest pieces of advice I got when my wife was pregnant was to catch up on sleep before my kid was born. It's both incredibly apt advice and terribly stupid advice. Stupid because there's no way to "catch up" on sleep before you lose it; you can't bank sleep. And apt because once you have a kid, as in DAY ONE, the amount of sleep you'll get for the rest of your life -- on both a daily basis and in accumulative "total sleep hours" -- begins to diminish and never stops. It's like someone pokes a hole in your canteen and slowly, all of it drains out. And there's no getting it back.

When you have kids, or even just one kid like I do, you don't get a day off. You don't have a chance to play catch-up. If you happen to stay up too late, or party too hard, or go out and get a little tipsy, you aren't getting the extra sleep you need the next day. You're not getting a chance to sleep in until your hangover goes away or you get some energy back. You get up when your kid gets up and you follow him around doing everything he needs because you're his slave and that's your life now. The same thing happens when you're sick. Your kid doesn't care if you're hugging the toilet or if you need your appendix out or if you have a headache. Your kid doesn't even care if he's the reason you have a headache (guess what? He is the reason.).

So sure, going on vacation with kids is still fun; it's just not much of a vacation anymore. Not like it was. Unless you have a nanny. In which case, I take back everything in this post and also I hate you.

Source: http://dadandburied.com/2013/05/28/the-reason-parents-are-always-so-tired/

Movies and snacks in bed

Amy's been a little not-herself lately. Grumpy, tired, etc. She's been several public, crowded places over the past week, so I'm assuming she just caught something and isn't feeling well. Sick or not, she's wanted to spend most of the day today in bed. So after a much needed nap, which is rare for her these days, I decided to set up our portable dvd player in her room so she can at least have some entertainment. It definitely improved her mood a bit.

We're having a lazy summer day. I'm definitely not complaining about it. This would normally be a multiple-cups-of-coffee kind of day for me, but since that's frowned upon, I must refrain. So Amy having no energy or desire to play actively today helps me out as well. I just wish she felt better.

On a separate topic, I went to the doctor yesterday. All is well with baby, but the doctor doesn't think he'll be making an appearance soon. Should be here in less than 3 weeks. If all goes according to plan, we should see him by the 29th. Which is kind of crazy. It's more real than ever now.

We're still undecided on his name, which is why I keep saying baby. Amy still thinks we should name him Amy. Brandon and I toss names around occasionally, but nothing sticks. We have differing opinions on good boy names. If anyone has any suggestions, they are welcome!!

I'm still hoping for the something-pops-into-our-head-when-we-see-him-and-it's-perfect scenario. Could I be that lucky?

Learning new skills

Amy doesn't like writing. At all. She doesn't even really care for drawing or coloring. They've just never been her thing. I recently made her a letter chart and this is the most she's ever sat down and been willing to do. Progress!

37 Weeks

So I am now technically full term, and could go into labor at any time. Though I imagine this baby will want to cook for a few more weeks before making his appearance.

We're almost ready for him, with stuff that is. We only have a few more things left to buy and we'll be getting those soon. Thanks to our awesome families for everything you've done!!


Knowing I was in labor last time was easy. My water broke and the doctor told me to go to the hospital. Contractions didn't even start for an hour or two, and were pretty small at first. This time I keep having thoughts about false labor and fear of me not knowing what's going on. Or having unbearable contractions (I have a pretty low pain tolerance), but my doctor telling me not to go in yet. I don't know. There are so many variables, I just wish there was a solid path for the way it all happens.

Next week, we have our hospital tour/pre-registration. So it will be nice to get at least a little perspective of how things will go once we get there. I don't know how different it will be having a baby here versus Canada, but at least I'll get to experience both sides.

Hiccups or torture?

Maybe I am terrible for thinking this, but when baby gets hiccups, it reminds me of Chinese water torture. Except instead of water dripping on my forehead, its a steady pulsing inside my abdomen. At first, it's just funny little movements, but after a while I feel like it's driving me insane. Can someone do some scientific research to figure out how to control these fetal hiccups? Moms everywhere would thank you.